My desk is a disaster zone. There, I’ve admitted it. It’s on paper, it’s documented, there’s no turning back. It has mountains of paper, stacks of receipts, and at least a hundred notes to my very own self. If I knew the location of these notes, perhaps I would answer myself. I’m not a timely correspondent with me, myself or I, unfortunately. I blame my writer’s brain, my creative ways, my tendency to pile things ... though the real talent I’m exhibiting here is avoidance. If I avoid it, it might just disappear or someone with a kind and organized heart may breeze through and tidy up.

I have visions of my desk after a complete makeover. It is dressed to the nines with fun and fabulous products from the Container Store and Staples and is an example of organized glory! Gone are the shoeboxes full of receipts, the paper folded into makeshift folders and stuffed with paid bills. These things are all housed in labeled, color-coded, sorted bins and file folders, of course. My collection of addresses, once torn and tattered envelope corners, are recorded in a tidy book, perhaps with a trendy cover. I would need to have several bins and catch-alls for my many pencils and pens; maybe a small basket for some sticky tabs and paperclips. Oh, what a world of pure bliss. I would assign an inbox and outbox, (perhaps in a lovely, gleaning stainless steel material) and have a corkboard on which to pin and tack my most important reminders and notes.

I’m under the impression that this wonderful desk area would change me as a whole. I would sit and stay when I should and finish projects. Currently, I’m easily distracted and prone to wandering off. Who knows how many brilliant thoughts have been cut short because a bird flies by the window or a particular snack sounds enticing. Those tricky snack foods lure me away every time. I would retrieve my mail on a daily basis and take it immediately to my desk where it would be examined and sorted right away. Things would move in and out of my office are in a smooth and timely fashion. Of course I will need some amazing stationery and one of those fancy desk blotter thingies to complete the look I have in mind. And a filing cabinet will complete the package. Oh, but wont I sift and sort myself silly. Ohhh, and I’ll have to procure a shredder so I can turn my very top secret stuff into confetti, making the task of reconstructing said secret stuff into an impossible mission. C’mon over, Tom Cruise, and just see if you can reconstruct my electric bill. My kilowatts and other energy supply information will be gone forever, far away from all those prying eyes.

Now that I’m so invested in this mega-desk that only exists in my mind, I feel I should probably obtain some artwork to hang in the space ... I’ll certainly need something to stare at and ponder when I am being creative and productive, all while sitting and staying. And a big, cushy office chair. Indeed. I’m nearly convinced that having a very corporate looking chair at my desk will make me smarter and more efficient and I’m thinking that adding a heat and massage feature will only enhance these features. I’ll be an organized, relaxed, toasty-warm genius in no time at all. Shelves. There will have to be shelves and cubbies to house my vast collection of organizing supplies and keep them off my glistening Mecca of deskness. (Now that I plan on having a genius chair, I believe I am allowed to invent works such as, “deskness.”) To begin this whole process I will have to find that catalog from the Container Store. Me thinks it’s on my desk ... this may take awhile.